Saturday, February 19, 2011

How To Be Clear And Direct In Your Communication

By Mark Latham


Many people discontinue talking with one another when some problem arises between. No communication usually is used as a synonym for being disconnected which eventually takes you to loneliness and detachment.

On the contrary, when couples keep connected with one another and talk well, they feel associated with one another and the relationship between then become stronger as time goes on.

People who want to change their communication pattern need to give time and look at the previous talking way they have. This will allow them to unlearn what is not appropriate for them and learn a better way of communication.

Communication has two basic components. One is what is said and the other is what is shown non-verbally. The listener will always look for what is actually shown non-verbally when one communicates. The words matter less than the body language specially when there is some discrepancy between the two.

Taking an example to understand this point, let's say you tell your friend that you really are found of his/her jacket but you have a frown on your face. Your friend will not believe your words for he/she know through your smile what you actually mean.

As time passes, couples learn communication patterns which keep repeating and eventually become a permanent style of the couples. All their points sound similar when they argue and their communication usually proves ineffective.

To smash the habit of the communication that is not useful, one or both of the couple have to make a knowing decision about changing it. By conscious efforts, changing a habitual style of communication becomes possible.

With the changed communication style, the couples will be successful in strengthening their relationship as they will communicate well by making the meaning of their words clear to one another. This newly learned talking pattern will teach them the art of listening and talking in an effective way.




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